2003-11-07���8:28 p.m.

WOW Have you ever heard something or read something that just totaly blew you away? I was watching Joan of arcadia tonight. (the show where the girl talks to God) and a priest on the show said the most amazing and true thing I have ever heard in my life. They were talking about dealing with death and things of that nature. The mom was saying that her son dident die and he was saying that when he got put in a wheel chair he may not of died but her vision of his future and how she dreamed his life would be died. Ok are you ready for it? He says "The most painful state of beeing is rembering the future, Especialy the one you can never have" WOW. I totaly love that. I totaly understand that. It just makes so much sense to me. As with most things it reminds me of Ela. Id like to know what you think about it. Well I am off to go sit and write in my book and listen to some music. I think tonight I will listen to something I havent in a while.....hum...Pixies. yeah that sounds good. Night.

cease to resist, giving my goodbye

drive my car into the ocean

you'll think i'm dead, but i sail away

on a wave of mutilation

a wave

wave