2002-12-15���5:00 p.m.

yucky yucky weekend. I am way sick. Not sure if I am going to go to work or not in the morning. This whole week has not been good. I guess I am depressed beacaus of the holiday season. I dont know why but it is makeing me miss Ela more then I usualy do. On the subject of Ela it realy anoys me that every other liscense plate in arkansas is XXX Ela the digets and then ELA does that make me psycho? dont answer that. I just miss her. I have been thinking a lot about when I went to germany. It was so good getting off the plane and seeing her there. I would give anything to see her right now. This whole no contact thing sucks. Just beacaus I dont talk to her or dont write her does not take her out of my heart or out of my mind. I still love her and miss her so much. I guess I always will. bye all